Birth Proves We Need to Appreciate Women More

The Birth of MilesGiving Birth

After nearly 9 months and 30+ hours of labor, Miles is here!  It then took us a few extra days to get out of the hospital.  Elizabeth did great during the birth, even with the incredibly long time and the crazy amount of pain and pressure of giving birth.

They really don’t tell you anything about what happens during childbirth and it is a shame.  The amount of work, the crazy things it does to a woman’s body and the whole scene of giving birth, is, well, underappreciated.

I am without the necessary writing skills to lend a real hand in understanding the process, but I will try.  Unfortunately, video of the event is still not proper in our modern society.

Hiding from Birth

So, why can’t we discuss it?  I remember one of the nurses explaining that as the father, I could just hide in a room and wait and they would call me when the baby was here.  They also discourage this behavior but understand it.

The nurses explained that this is what was expected for decades where the fathers would just go in a room and distract themselves and never know what actually happened.  Then all of a sudden, they would see a clean and cozy baby through a window, told that the baby and mother did great, and then brought to a recovery room to be with the family.  Today they do encourage fathers to be a part of the birth.  It is odd that anyone would have to be encouraged as it seems essential.

I was there in support, the only thing I could give was love and encouragement, and I couldn’t imagine doing any less.  I was there from the first contraction through the difficult birth and it was hard.

It was hard to see someone I love doing something so challenging and painful.  I think there is a lot of growing up that father’s need to do.  After all, this is how we all are born and to ignore and keep it hidden, is dishonest.

Discussing Life and Birth

Why don’t we talk about giving birth and how difficult and traumatic it really is and always will be.  From the moment labor starts, it is a roller coaster of worry, pain, struggle, humility, wonder, and elation.  It is just my opinion, but if we want to really make a change in how we look at life, everyone should have to be part of the birth of a child early on in life.  We should have to understand the end result of having a sexual relationship.

We should have to look at the truth of what it means to be ready for this type of outcome. After all, we treat sexual relationships like they don’t lead to the inevitable child staring at you, after it grows for 9 months inside of a woman and then is pushed out to the world with nothing but two naive parents, looking at him or her for the first time.

Women and Life

The bottom line is that a life is being created.  We call them all babies when they are born.  A baby that has to be grown inside a woman. We wrap up the entire growing a baby process in one word; pregnancy.  Turns out that pregnancy is also underappreciated.  It is difficult, has stages of complication and is not by any stretch of the imagination free from discomfort and struggle. 

Then at the end of that 9-month journey, a living breathing little boy or girl has to be moved out to the world in a stunning and slow-moving process that very few people see prior to having their own children if they see it at all.  The importance of a woman is without a doubt clearly established separately during pregnancy and then during the birth of a child. 

A Women’s World Without Credit

It is a woman’s world, but without the credit or appreciation.  A woman’s world that the world is unwilling to come to terms with.  In our modern time, I’m unsure why it isn’t headlined news when children are born, the process of getting there and the overall accomplishment that is life. 

Why the news dedicates none of its time to the birth of children is shameful and lacks honesty.  What is more important and impacts our lives more than the bringing about of a new life.  

This is our second child, and it is odd how each child is different, but the experience is the same.  It is difficult.  It is heartbreaking with the pain and ends in triumph and elation.  But, then the work continues.

It doesn’t ever stop.  Real life is nowhere on television and isn’t in enough stories.  It is a struggle, hard work, and worries with a reward for a good life.  It is love and compassion mixed with worry and accomplishment.

I find myself still looking back even though a month has passed.  A month has passed since Miles was born and it has been great, but difficult.  There is always a struggle, but this struggle is worth it.  It isn’t about getting a sale, making money, or entertaining ourselves.  It is about life.  A life that needs constant love and help.

Andrew and Miles

So with Miles being here, Andrew has a new brother.  Andrew is learning how a brother feels to have and how much time it takes to make it all work.  Andrew is taking on his new role as big brother in stride and is slowly learning that he has to be patient to as it will be some time before Miles is ready to play.

Sunday Night With Wine

Glass of wineWell, it’s Sunday night. I decided tonight I would just go ahead and have a nice glass of wine and relax as the week ends.  I have decided that there are a few things I need to change. One of those things is getting into some more healthy routine’s. Seems that if I just get myself to do the things that are more healthy such as eating better and regular exercise, that I won’t have to worry about doing things randomly to try to make it work.

So as I sit here this evening sipping on a bottle of decent wine I am making plans to make sure that I can just do things that make me a better human inside and out.



Cracker Barrel Breakfast

Sunday Morning!

Elizabeth, Andrew and I decided to start out with a fun stop off at Cracker Barrel for some breakfast.  Some great pancakes and bacon for Andrew.  A little of everything for me and a lot of French toast for Elizabeth. It is a new day and a good day.  I’m trying to get more time out of each day and I’m trying to get in front of everything.  This requires getting up a little earlier these days.

Andrew was probably surprised that we were at a restaurant for breakfast on a Sunday, which I am trying to change.  I have to admit, staying in bed a few hours later on the weekends has been the way I usually spend my breakfast time. This morning, Andrew and Elizabeth were already awake and enjoying the morning, like they do everyday and they mentioned Cracker Barrel and I decided to start making some big changes in my life and turning them into great habits.  I want to spend more time with my family, and there is only one way to do that.  I need a new routine.

Cracker Barrel vs. Sleep

Watching Andrew and Elizabeth enjoying the morning at Cracker Barrel is much better and more important than a few hours of sleep.  Andrew playing the golf tee triangle game and Elizabeth taking a few pictures and catching up with me on the latest news felt good.



So, what are we going to do with all of these delicious breakfast foods. Eat them!  And, I’m craving some milk to wash it down.   Unfortunately, for the grits, they didn’t get much of a chance. They are very tasty, but the consistency gets rough as soon as they start to cool.  The bacon on the table had no chance as did most of the eggs.


Elizabeth polished off most of the French toast sharing a whole piece with Andrew who thinks he may like it.  We will see, in a few weeks if he weather he really likes it when we give him the option of choosing it over pancakes or waffles.  It was a good start for an overcast Sunday.  We are going to need this good start to get all of our chores done.  The dogs need a bath.  The dog room needs a scrubbing and  the garage needs organizing and the laundry needs to be completed for the start of a new week.  It isn’t fun, but it feels good when everything gets done.

Happy Sunday!

Tired of Eating Out

Stay in or Eating Out

Stuck in a world of convenience?  What is convenient about food that someone else makes?  When eating out the food is always filled with fat and salt.  It is always washed by chemicals and prepared in bulk.  It costs a lot and takes longer to get than it would be to just make it ourselves.  But, staying in and making our own meals is too much work and all you have to do is look at all of the billions of dollars spent by people selling food to remind you of this one hundred or more times a day.

So, what do we do?  We eat it anyways.  We eat junk whether it is served through a drive thru window, brought home and eaten on the couch or when we sit down in the restaurant and pay another 20% to have someone bring it to us.  It is a  complete waste of time, money and energy.

At this point, I am working on how to stop the craziness of eating out.  I probably eat more fat and salt than appears possible, and I will never know.  Do you know what these restaurants are actually putting in the food?  How much butter and salt substitutes?  I can’t be the only one who thinks that there is a problem.

I want to eat well and enjoy the food I eat.  I am all for a little convenience, but restaurants are anything but when it comes to our overall health and well being.  Do you really think the places you eat at are worried that you might be eating too much sugar, fat, salt and empty calories?  Of course they don’t think about you.  

From this day forward, I am going to change it up a little.  I am going to move in the right direction and stop eating anywhere but at home.  I am going to start treating myself to good food at a good price.

Could it be true that buying all of the ingredients cost more when we go to the store than it would if we just buy it from the restaurant?  Is it true that we just waste more food trying to cook at home?  I will keep you ‘posted’.

Elizabeth is Still Full of Mucus

Sickly Mucus Filled Lady

So here we are on day three of a mucus nightmare and we are getting it under control.  Elizabeth can breath through her nose, but the damage has been done.  Her sense of taste comes and goes and her right side sinuses are still sensitive.  However, based on where we were two days ago, times are good.

Oh, yes, looking back to Thursday and the ear pain and constant pain of blowing her nose have passed.  Her nose may still be full of junk, but not like the train of mucus it once was.

We decided to take it easy for a few days and use some old time methods of relaxation.  Just watching some television and eating out.  For now, Elizabeth is getting through the crud as both Andrew and I have.  

Soon, we may get a week since Christmas where one of us isn’t throwing up, stuck in bed with a fever or blowing our noses.  It appears this happens each year about December and sticks around until Spring.  Could it be the school year? Yes!  Can we do anything about it at this point?  No.  But, this two may have a solution.

Locking up a bunch of children all together every year through the winter, in a mucus filled school,  is certainly a recipe for getting the whole country sick every year. And, who am I to suggest that we can’t change this awful practice of bad hygiene institutional stupidity.  Does anyone really think this is a good idea?  If you do think it is a good idea, is it because you have to work? or is it because, placing all of the 5 year olds in the county in the same buildings sounds like a good way to keep them all less sick for three months of hell.  Oh, well, I am getting down off my box and moving on.  Hoping and knowing that this season of joy shall soon pass.